Letters to Me

I'm joining the bandwagon that a saw on one of the blogs I enjoy - Letters to Me.

Dear Sara (age 3):

You're a new big sister. Help mom out and as your sister grows pick on her less. She'll be your best friend before you know it.

Dear Sara (age 10):

You're going to get glasses this year. Please look in the mirror before picking them out. You once thought they were cool, but you'll learn that you REALLY miss being able to see without them. Oh yea - they don't make you look like a dork nor do they define you as one. Be your own person. And remember to Laugh often!

Dear Sara (age 11):

Welcome to middle school! Warning - it sucks and you hate it - but you do well in school. You'll get your first visit from Aunt Flo' the first week of middle school and Mom will be out of town. I know it's embarrassing to ask Dad to take you to the store, but he'll do it and you live through it. PLEASE don't start trying to shape your eyebrows on your own. It will be a disaster and you'll spend years trying to get them to look right. Tell your parents you love them more! You'll start to notice boys in the next few years. You don't need them - focus more on cultivating your friendships. Laugh often!

Dear Sara (age 16):

Your driving! Remember to always turn on your headlights at night (you escape that ticket, but it's rather embarrassing). You're more of a homebody and you love to spend time with your family. Your parents will worry that you don't have friends or a good hobby and will suggest you take flying lessons. You love it, but can't seem to shake the motion sickness. Enjoy the flights, but know when it's time to quit. You have a great group of friends - spend more time with the girls developing the friendship - the boys will fade throughout the next few years. Laugh often!

Dear Sara (age 18):

Off to collage. Please try to release your grip over everything and not be so controlling. Make friends with the girls in your hall. You'll regret that you never got close to anyone. That boy (you know who), please don't spend to much time with him. He'll hurt your heart. Even though his actions do not match his words - he will hurt you and you'll feel like you wasted your time and will carry that scar into the future. Laugh often!

Dear Sara (age 20):

Take the job! You'll gain great experience and meet the man who you will fall head over heels for. Enjoy this time. It's the best summer of your life. Laugh often!

Dear Sara (age 21):

You're intuition is correct - in June your parents will announce that they are getting a divorce and have been "separated" for the past 9 months. Yes, they hide it very well. Lean on your boyfriend and be there for your sister. It's okay to grieve this divorce and you need to. Laugh often!

Dear Sara (age 24):

This is a big year for you. You got engaged last summer and couldn't be happier. It was a great move to move in with mom before you get married as you'll be able to buy a house. You get married this year. As your planning the wedding, stick to your wants and take care of telling people what needs to be told early! It will save you many headaches in the future. The wedding is beautiful. For pictures, don't hold the back of your dress because you don't want it to get dirty or wet (it rains that day by the way, but clears up for your ceremony and pictures) - you'll wish you did in the future. Laugh often!

New Learnings of Marriage

During the last 3 months, its been busy season for me. Which means a minimum of 11 hour days but really more like 13-14 hours, so my time with Richard has been limited to the 15 minutes after I get home in the evenings before I crash from exhaustion and any weekend time that isn't filled with other commitments. We are ready for a vacation!! but more on that soon....

This weekend while talking with my family, Richard mentioned how hard it has been on him to not have me around in the evenings. I think I knew this in the back of my mind - but wow, I hadn't really considered it. I've been too busy trying to get through the week to see the light at the end of the busy season tunnel, that I missed this important aspect. Last year, while we were living together busy season didn't really affect us. Since we moved into the house in March, then I traveled for 2 straight weeks, we didn't miss out routine b/c we didn't have one. Since we hadn't lived together before, there was no missing the other in the evenings. This year has been a whole different story: now we've become used to making dinner together, playing with the cats, and watching some re-run, or Big Bang Theory (LOVE that show!!) Richard put it great tonight - it's almost like we have to re-learn eachother every week and re-establish our routines. So now I'm pondering how to be a wife first, then an auditor?

We've done really well with having a weekly date night - just us! Spend some time together discussing our weeks and what's going on in the world that we live.

Richard did mention that this year has been harder b/c there are joint decisions that need to me made and with me not around in the evenings and unavailable during the days to chat on the phone, it has been tough. Add to that, that we're both exhausted on the weekends. If I don't have to work on Saturday, then its the cleaning and chores around the house that need to be done.

I have to say though, my husband is amazing! He takes care of me and the house in ways that I don't necessarily notice and for that, I am greatly appreciative.

How do people have time for jobs and families? Gosh, we've both pondered what life will look like when we're ready to be parents... its a ways off, but pondering.

On a happy note - we've booked our 1st Anniversary trip to Europe! My mom is incredibly generous and donated miles for us to use to get over there. So we're going to Paris , Prague and Rome! We both so desperately need a vacation!

Christmas Time is Here

(Not my house, nor my tree)

Merry Christmas!

We've almost finished all the shopping and wrapping and are looking forward to the days ahead spent with Family. I think we've finally got the schedule nailed down and it doesn't look too horrific!

Christmas Eve Day:

• Good family friends - Richard is really just another one of their kiddos!
• StepDad-in-laws' sisters' party! - should be a good time with good peps

Christmas Day:

• Home - just us to start. We are newlyweds! and want to relax a little. I'm thinking a nice breakfast together and then presents... of course the cats will want to play
• Grandma D's - Richard's mom's side of the fam
• Philip & Teresita's house - Richard's dad's side of the fam and other good fam friends
• My Nana & Boo's house - My Mom's side of things

Day After Christmas:

• Hockey game with Dad and Jen to celebrate with them!

This year we bought an artificial tree - 9 feet tall, LARGE diameter, and multi-colored lights! I love(d) it. But didn't realize how big the base was until after we put it up (oops - sorry honey). We loved it for the first 5 minutes - until the first strand of lights went out, unlighting the entire tree -- my BRAND NEW tree. So we went with it. It was only at the bottom and if I just bipassed that strand, the tree would light. Then a second strand went out - right in the mid-section of the tree. Sad day.

So after Christmas (since I want it up for Christmas), we'll be returning the tree, getting a full refund and then trying again. Perhaps there will be some good clearance trees?? If not, there is always next year!

What are your plans?

Thanksgiving 2009

Thanksgiving this year is a first for us ... both as a married couple and as I experience the effects of newly divorced parents with one now living in another state. So we're going to Chicago and we're bring my sister along with us. Looks like the weather will be decent (for Chicago in November) and we're excited to see the city and Dad's new diggs out there.

We'll be doing the traditional Thanksgiving dinner and seeing the city, but other than that - really no plans. I hope to have a restful trip so that I can return to work refreshed and ready to hit up busy season! Richard NEEDS the break from school. We're not even bringing our computers so there will be minimal temptation for either of us to work :)

A little list of things I'm thankful for this year:
-Richard
-Getting all our wedding photos (it took a long time, but I just ordered an album)
-The love of family and friends
-My new computer (LOVE IT)
-The house ... even though it comes with an evil HOA
-Good books that let my mind escape to an alternate world

Happy Thanksgiving to all!

Snow!

This is my backyard and the front of my house today after 26 inches of snow! I can't remember the last time that we got this much snow so early in the season.

Richard woke up early yesterday (and for him that's HUGE) to shovel the driveway for me so I could get to work on time. Then we both did 2 shifts of shoveling this morning and then again this morning. I opted to make today a work from home day! But Rich had to go to class.

Love the beauty of the snow!

My Husband ... The Farmer

Quick shout out to my husband ... his hard work out in our garden all summer long, we now have over 225 tomatoes! and 12 Green Peppers!

Richard worked tirelessly out in the garden, watering, providing vitamins, and singing lullabyes (.. well maybe not). He loves to garden and we are totally reaping the rewards. I wish I had been thinking and taken a picture of him and his garden before we harvested. The tomato plants were over 6.5 feet all and eventually due to being top heavy all fell over. With the cold nights last wewek and more expected this week, we decided to harvest over the weekend.

Did you know that to help tomatoes which are not ripe to ripen, you're supposed to wrap in newspaper and put them in a cool, dark area??? Really! When Richard told me this, I had to call BS - they're plants and plants need the sun, right? Nope - I was wrong. But then again I was raised in a house full of black thumbs.... my Nana can grow anything, but sadly that wasn't passed to Mom and well Dad hates all things dirty, including dirt for gardening. So no gardening happened at my house.

Last night, Richard shared with me a favorite treat of his from childhood - Fried Green Tomatoes. No, not the movie - the actual frying of non-ripe tomatoes. Yummy!

Recent Reflections

In the last week, I feel as though many people have asked us "how's married life?" Well its good - but it is really no different. If anything, we spend less time together than we did before we were married. Not because we don't want to be around eachother, but because we are more secure in us. We get to hang-out together often - and I love it! Our schedules don't always allow us to get to see the "best" of the other, but I love what we do get.

I love kissing a still sleeping Richard every morning before I leave for work, getting home first and starting dinner or doing something around the house, kissing him goodnight as he watches the game or reads his textbook. I used to love going to bed in the darkness of my bedroom, but now, I almost need the light on - cuz I know he'll come to bed and turn it off. I know that he'll check that the door is closed and locked and for some reason, that makes me feel safe.

So looking back on our 2.5 months of marriage - I know that I long for our marriage to be one that honors eachother and the values we share together. I think we're doing that well now and I pray that we continue to do so.

Rich starts school this week to get his master's degree. I'm so proud of him for starting the jounrey, but we both know that we have years of classes, projects, and finals ahead of him. While I can't speak for him, I think we're both standing at the base of this mountain wondering what it will bring. We know that it can be done, but it's a long climb, especially with one class at a time. He will have to put in the hard work required to pass while working full time. I can't do the work for him, but I find myself wondering how I can ease some of the pressure/work/stress that comes from taking this on. How can I support him the most in this new stage of our live together?